Wow - just found out that somebody else is pregnant. That makes 13 people I know expecting. I didn't even know this many knocked up women when I was preggers. Why now when I can't be in that position? Times like this makes me feel really angry at my situation!!!
I must have alot on my mind lately because my various dreams last night (ones that I remembered) all have to do with some sort of turmoil. Wonder what's that all about.
One of the dreams I had was going into my dentist office and the parking lot, reception area, office building, everywhere I looked, there were pregnant ladies. I couldn't look anywhere without seeing them all around me. Why the dentist? I don't know. But I just wanted to scream and run away!!
And then in another dream, I was at work and the head of our office decided that hourly employees no longer can earn overtime pay although overtime hours were expected. And no reimbursement for mileage. And that he was taking away our holidays. Next was taking away all benefits. Everything was being taken away from us, bit by bit. And I was unhappy but the economy was bad and I couldn't leave this job without having another. That dream was pretty interesting as my company went through a merger and the managing guy here is from the other company and there are many changes in place within the company.
So my dreams definitely had some significance to things going on in my life. Wish I can remember the happy dreams I had. So wierd as I can occassionally remember some dreams while have no remberance of others.
In other news, its Halloween weekend. I am so not the dressing up kind of gal. But I am going to a costume-required party on Saturday evening. I put on my costume last night and my husband was laughing hysterically. Its going to be a loooonnnng night. Going to another party earlier in the day, but there is no way I can wear my get-up with kids and families around. So my husband and kid will dress up (as they are a pair --- Dr. Evil & Mini-me) and I'll throw on my costume before hitting the adult party. Then we will be going trick o' treating in my neighborhood on Sunday - on the earlier side - so we are back to hand out candy to the kids later on. Still have to work on hemming the boys' costumes tonight. And after work, I have to run out and get a few more items for me. Leave it to me to wait til the last minute to pull everything together. Next year, we are keeping things more simple and just getting costumes off the shelf...
Got married at 40, had a kid at 42. Thought I had life figured out. Then everything changes and you realized that even though you thought you knew it all, you really know nothing. And every day is a new day to experience. You see life out of your child's eyes and it is magnificent.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Infertility Sucks
It seems as if every other day, I'm finding out that somebody else is pregnant and giving their child a sibling. I'm really happy for them, but I can't help to be sad and depressed everytime I hear of another. I would love to give my son a baby sister or brother but its just not to be. When I hear of another pregnancy and I get depressed and feel sorry for myself, that's when I need to pick up my baby (who is actually turning 2 in 3 weeks -eeek!) and give him lots of hugs and kisses and be thankful for him because he was truely a miracle.
After 2 failed IVF treatments, we were 3rd time lucky and got a beautiful boy in 1998. A few months ago, I jumped back onto the IVF train and started going through treatment. Twice. And both came out negative.
So we are done and just have to hang on to our little miracle and hope that he doesn't push too hard for a sibling when he gets older. I'm dreading having to talk to him about why he doesn't have a sister or brother to play with.
After 2 failed IVF treatments, we were 3rd time lucky and got a beautiful boy in 1998. A few months ago, I jumped back onto the IVF train and started going through treatment. Twice. And both came out negative.
So we are done and just have to hang on to our little miracle and hope that he doesn't push too hard for a sibling when he gets older. I'm dreading having to talk to him about why he doesn't have a sister or brother to play with.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Another Weekend
Has it already been a week since I last wrote? That seems unbelievable, but then again days are all meshing together and weeks are flying by at a rapid pace.
This week, I went back to my doctor's office as she wanted to talk to me about some of my blood results. Turns out that although my blood pressure and glucose numbers are good, my insulin levels and cholestorol (sp?) numbers are not. So now I'm on a couple of meds to try to get things in order before I turn diabetic. Diabetes runs in my family. And being overweight, this is something that has been on my mind for years, but all my levels have been good..up until now. I better get on the ball and beat this thing before it beats me!!
The meds have been weirding me out though. One gets me all wired. And the other gives me stomach aches. What joyous week its been. ugghh....
Turns out that the Halloween costume I ordered online doesn't fit. It has been really difficult to find something in my size. I ordered the size I would normally wear, but it is way too tight. Seems to me that the manufacturers of Halloween costumes are the same people who make wedding and bridesmaid dresses. Meaning they are way smaller than 'regular' clothes. So I sent it back and spent days searching the web, I think I may have found something through http://www.yandy.com/ It should be here next week. I sure hope this one fits because I'm running out of time to get something! Not that I want a 'sexy' costume, but beggars can't be choosers. I just wonder what it will look like when I go to a kiddie party and treak or treating with my kid. oh well, its Halloween, right? ;)
The in-laws are visiting this weekend. We've been seeing them every 6-8 weeks since having the baby. A bit more than I like but he is their own grandson so I suck it up. But I am also going to have some fun while they are here.
Meeting some momma friends tonight for dinner. Should be fun, interesting conversation. And then tomorrow night, after the baby is put down and the in-laws leave, the babysitter is coming over and we are heading out to Hollywood to meet a friend for his birthday.
My friend Drew is a kick. He always has to celebrate his birthday. This year, its at Bar Sinister (http://www.barsinister.net/), which is a dark, alternative, industrial, gothic, fetish club where black is the mandatory attire. I suppose the people watching will be interesting. I'm sure I'll stand out as a sore thumb because no matter how I dress, I just don't look goth. I'm sure I'll have stories to post next week on this little adventure. haha
Have a great weekend everyone!
This week, I went back to my doctor's office as she wanted to talk to me about some of my blood results. Turns out that although my blood pressure and glucose numbers are good, my insulin levels and cholestorol (sp?) numbers are not. So now I'm on a couple of meds to try to get things in order before I turn diabetic. Diabetes runs in my family. And being overweight, this is something that has been on my mind for years, but all my levels have been good..up until now. I better get on the ball and beat this thing before it beats me!!
The meds have been weirding me out though. One gets me all wired. And the other gives me stomach aches. What joyous week its been. ugghh....
Turns out that the Halloween costume I ordered online doesn't fit. It has been really difficult to find something in my size. I ordered the size I would normally wear, but it is way too tight. Seems to me that the manufacturers of Halloween costumes are the same people who make wedding and bridesmaid dresses. Meaning they are way smaller than 'regular' clothes. So I sent it back and spent days searching the web, I think I may have found something through http://www.yandy.com/ It should be here next week. I sure hope this one fits because I'm running out of time to get something! Not that I want a 'sexy' costume, but beggars can't be choosers. I just wonder what it will look like when I go to a kiddie party and treak or treating with my kid. oh well, its Halloween, right? ;)
The in-laws are visiting this weekend. We've been seeing them every 6-8 weeks since having the baby. A bit more than I like but he is their own grandson so I suck it up. But I am also going to have some fun while they are here.
Meeting some momma friends tonight for dinner. Should be fun, interesting conversation. And then tomorrow night, after the baby is put down and the in-laws leave, the babysitter is coming over and we are heading out to Hollywood to meet a friend for his birthday.
My friend Drew is a kick. He always has to celebrate his birthday. This year, its at Bar Sinister (http://www.barsinister.net/), which is a dark, alternative, industrial, gothic, fetish club where black is the mandatory attire. I suppose the people watching will be interesting. I'm sure I'll stand out as a sore thumb because no matter how I dress, I just don't look goth. I'm sure I'll have stories to post next week on this little adventure. haha
Have a great weekend everyone!
Friday, October 1, 2010
Another Friday...And its the Weekend!!
Fridays seem to come pretty quickly these days. Work has been busy so maybe that's why everything seems to be a blur.
Being the last game of the year, it is Fan Appreciation Day and they are giving away 15,000 prizes. Yes...15,000!! So I hope that we get something out of it. Its the least they can do for putting us through the season this year!
We were going to get season tickets for next year, but have decided that until the whole McCourt drama is done, we aren't gonna give them another dime of our money. McCourt needs to sell the franchise and step away in order to save it. Not that his opinion matters any more, but for O'Malley (the Dodgers former owner) to publicly berate McCourt -- says an awful lot about the state of affairs. All we want is a winning team of which we can all be proud. It's just so sad to see such a great historic franchise, a national icon -- be driven into the ground and set ablaze.
And that's just my two cents for today....
What are your plans for this weekend?
The plans for this weekend include attending a 3 year old birthday party at Chuck E Cheese (germs galore; I'm going to have hand sanitizer with me everywhere me and the kid touch!).
Then spending Saturday evening with some gals. Hanging in watching a movie and eating, talking, etc. I really think its important to have some "me" time away from the hubby and kid. Makes me appreciate everything more even if its a few hour break. Plus its nice to talk to other mommas and compare toddler drama..
My mom is visiting us Sunday morning. She's in town visiting her so-called "Boyfriend". That's a whole other long story that I will share some other time. So since she's in the LA Area, she's stopping by to spend some time with the little one.
In the afternoon, we are heading to Elysian Field to see the Dodgers. What a disappointing season it has been between the McCourt divorce drama and the losing season. Its the last game of the year and couldn't come too soon. The only reason why we are going is that the tickets are part of the 7-game season ticket package that we bought in order to see the Yankees/Dodger game earlier this summer.
I can't say that going to the games have been bad. Its really a fun family day. Its so much fun to see my son enjoy himself. When he was a baby, he would cry everytime the crowd got loud. Now he screams and yells with the crowd. He flirts with all the girls. And he gets alot of attention from everyone around us.
Being the last game of the year, it is Fan Appreciation Day and they are giving away 15,000 prizes. Yes...15,000!! So I hope that we get something out of it. Its the least they can do for putting us through the season this year!
We were going to get season tickets for next year, but have decided that until the whole McCourt drama is done, we aren't gonna give them another dime of our money. McCourt needs to sell the franchise and step away in order to save it. Not that his opinion matters any more, but for O'Malley (the Dodgers former owner) to publicly berate McCourt -- says an awful lot about the state of affairs. All we want is a winning team of which we can all be proud. It's just so sad to see such a great historic franchise, a national icon -- be driven into the ground and set ablaze.
And that's just my two cents for today....
What are your plans for this weekend?
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